Not long ago I received the Jury Summons in the mail. Last year I postponed three times and then a year went by so I figured I should go this time. It's never convenient and more importantly, I am seldom someones peer. That is to say I do not suffer fools who bring frivolous lawsuits to court and waste time and money for people like me. Without getting all full of myself, I am also articulate, fairly intelligent, and I speak well. All traits that if exhibited during voir dire will INCREASE your chances of being selected for jury service.
Now before you think me some pompous, superior ass, I support our legal system and the merits of jury trials. As seen on shows like Law & Order. Versus, I don't know...Hee Haw?? I have had the
The case was ridiculous and cost me three days of my life I will never get back. It was minority vs big company (DR Horton Construction). The wife apparently wore the pants in the family and had very limited education/vocabulary, couple that with the feeling of being slighted and Diary Of A Mad Black Woman was unfolding before my eyes. Her much older husband sat there looking tortured throughout the entire proceedings. Essence of the case? Her house was not built by DR Horton! DR Horton is a huge company and they use several smaller sub contractors to build various neighborhoods. When this lady went by the construction site there was a sign in front of her house with the contractor's name on it..."But she wants her DR Horton home now". I could not stay awake after the first hour. I wanted the cafeteria cook to poison my lunch. I wanted to fake Tourettes. The minutia discussed was like morphine for my brain. I understood the entire case (and my verdict) by the first break. The rest of the day and the next was restating and rehashing.
When the case went to deliberation, I wasn't even the foreman but I told every one in the room the logical conclusion we need to reach (and fast) and get the hell out of there. We still spent half a day rehashing again. One of the jurors thought this was a landmark case or something and wanted to be sure we were doing the right thing. Even requested some of the evidence be brought in and testimony re-read. Seriously?? This lady was in her new home, there was nothing wrong with it, construction was to code, no complaint about any of that...the only friggin' thing was the sign in the front yard did not say DR Horton Home. Oh I wanted a cyanide pill to bite on...or a an automatic weapon. To this day I cannot even tell you the final verdict.
Sooo...this time I am again in the jury pool room. This room is large and crammed full of every "walk of life". I swear I saw two or three homeless in there (how do they get notified??) Everyone hacking and coughing and sucking snot...what a petri dish of humanity you have to endure to do your civic duty. Something exactly like this (but with every other seat occupied):
My juror number was like 1605. They start calling from 1. I felt confident. I then learned how many people opted out of attending when they started calling 400 numbers at a time to get 40 people and by the fifth jury selection I was in that called group. And they had only called about 180 people total. Not good for me. Attrition was not going to work today. Insult to injury, I was in the last jury selection for the day and everyone else got to go home.
We go upstairs and sit on the hard-ass benches outside the courtroom while the attorneys are making motions. The bailiff came out trying to be a comedian but no one was having it. After an hour of this...he told us to break for lunch and be back at 1PM. Oh joy.
This will get even more boring if I go on much longer but here is the Cliff notes:
I read the docket outside the courtroom for the case we were up for (I was the only one of the potential jurors to do this). I found out this was an eminent domain case. When I mentioned this to a couple other people I could see they thought I was speaking a foreign language. I formulated my strategy to get through voir dire and assure myself of NOT getting selected. Unfortunately this voir dire was never ending because there were 40 potential jurors for 6 spots. The attorneys had to keep explaining what the case was about. After it was over we had to go back out in the hallway and wait another hour before they called in the 6 people they wanted. Now its 6:15 and night dark, raining, downtown Dallas and everyone is on the road. I'm going home.
UPDATE FROM SCHEDULED POST!!!
I just received a jury questionnaire for the friggin' US District Court! Are you kidding me??
This time I am wearing this:
Shouldn't qualify as contempt of court, should it??
18 comments:
It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it -- just hopefully not you or me! I seem to get notified every year, but last year was the worst. I was on call for the entire month of March, had to line up a substitute teacher for my classes EVERY SCHOOL DAY just in case, and ended up not even being called in.
I do anything and say stupid stuff to avoid jury duty. Can't think of a bigger waste of my time.
Guilty until proven innocent, right? Wear the shirt. Let me know if you need the matching hat, I'm confident I can find it in my closet!
Wow, intense story! Best of luck.
Sarah Allen
(my creative writing blog)
Hilarious post!
I've only actually had to report for jury duty once, in which case there was no trial. But, I know exactly what you mean about the homeless people, luckily I got the better of the two court houses near me (which isn't sayng much). I even had foreign people that didn't speak english in the waiting room.
And, please, please, pleeease wear that t-shirt. I saw some dude wearing a graphic T with some quote written in Spanish in the waiting room last time I had jury duty.
I've been called, but somehow I've never gone beyond the first day. I'm surprised because my employer paid you your full wages while on jury duty. I tried, but never made it. These days, you call in everyday. They tell you whether or not to come in. Since they started that, I've never even had to actually go to the courthouse.
You should post your answers for that questionnaire!
That does sound like a painful experience. But still...I'd like to serve on a jury someday!
Milo: THAT sounds like cruel and unusual punishment to me!
Stephen: I'll it's fun watching you do that, huh?
Jenn: You just want to see me shackled and hauled off to a cell don't you?
Sarah: Yeah, it's hard to mess around with US District Court. Dallas county court...much easier.
Chiz: There are two courthouses here in Dallas and I will NOT go to the one where the jail is. They had one prisoner on clean up detail after a sprinkler system malfunction and he just walked out of the courthouse and is running around free right now. No thank you.
Pat: I have had a couple times where I just had to call in...then again I had one time where I drove all the way into Dallas only to be told I would be assigned to the JP court...in the city where I live!
Alex: If they are worthwhile I just may do that...as a Q post!
Stephanie: On a meaningful worthwhile trial I would agree.
Chuck, I'm on a witness list for a law suit against our town. (I'm a member of the Planning Commission.)The town attorney has asked that I be allowed to do a written depostion if called. I'm trying to make plans to meet our daughter in Wisconsin at that time, and I don't understand if they can compel me to be there. That's really unfair!
I can understand your anguish over the Texas Rangers. I'm now a Rangers fan (until the WS if the Cards are there) because I hate the traitor Albert Pujols!!! He didn't help us win the WS, but got his three homeruns in one game when we didn't need those runs.
Thanks for commenting on my blog.
Monti
I want to do jury duty once, for the experience. (In other words, I want to be able to write about the whole process without relying solely on TV and movies.) But not a long, drawn out case, and not anything like what you've gone through, and not-- you know, on second thought, TV and movies sound might good to me.
I've never been called and I hope never to be called. Sheesh, what a gong show.
Send everyone to Judge Judy
I always get called for jury duty. In fact I am about due again.
I am trying to read all the A to Z blogs, but coming back to the ones I really like.
Looking forward to seeing what you do all month!
Tim
The Other Side
The Freedom of Nonbelief
Monti: Hopefully your lawsuit woes will work out for you. I have to agree, Pujols leaving was pretty crappy. I bet he did it because Tony retired.
Nate: Younever know when you number is up for service. You may still get your wish...or you could just apply as an extra on L&O.
Clarissa: Gong SHow is an accurate description of what I have gone through every time I have been summoned.
PTM: Keeping it real dude...and simple.
Tim: I will reciprocate and stop your digs. You have really bad luck if you get called that often.
In my opinion as a lawyer, a prosecuting attorney for twenty years and then a criminal defense attorney, I have to disagree with you on a few of your observations and remarks. First of all, it has been my experience that most well educated, intelligent or otherwise savvy potential jurors are the first to be excused because they know how to answer the questions in a manner certain to disqualify them. Many upper class,well educated professionals are sharp enough to get excused prior to the day they are supposed to appear.
This does not make me happy, because I would much prefer a venire of a true and accurate cross section of the community.
While I understand your frustration with the judicial system, it is the best in the world. Yes, citizens are required to taken time from their busy day and even forego the opportunity to earn real money, but, if not for the sacrifice of everyday, normal people our system would fail.
Most defense lawyers strive to select the undereducated, hoping they won't be able to understand and apply the law. In reading your recantation of your prior jury service I couldn't help, but wonder what someone like you would expect from a jury if you were being sued or if you found yourself in the unfortunate position of being charged (perhaps wrongfully) with a serious crime.
Would you want someone like you with your attitude deciding whether or not you were liable for an extraordinary amount of damages, or worse deciding the fate of your liberty?
The female juror you complained of was doing exactly what a juror should do. Regardless of whether it was a landmark case or not, you can bet your ass, it was the most important case, the most important day to the person or persons experiencing the stress of a law suit. In a criminal case, every case is a landmark case to the person affected by the outcome.
I cannot believe that you have the audacity to complain about having to spend a half of day to deliberate. What exactly do you understand the word deliberation to mean? It is not hard to ascertain why you were not selected to serve as foreman. Ordinarily people of your stature and looked to by the other jurors for guidance.
I commend the woman for actually deliberating the case as the judge charged the jury to do in his jury charge. A juror who ask to review the evidence and go over testimony demonstrates a superior intelligence in my book than someone who would rather make a life altering decision about another without so much as a cursory review of the evidence and testimony and without the decency and responsibility to discuss his interpretation of said with his fellow jurors.
You apparently live a good life. Perhaps you should recognize that all of your rights and privileges have been afforded to you by the Constitution. The next time you take liberty with one of your many privileges, why don't you consider that without the constitution and our time honored legal system you would not have the lifestyle you have. Try to remember how close we come to losing our valued rights and liberties every time someone with so little respect for the process and the court enters into a jury room holding the power to permanently alter another persons life without so much as even caring about the law, the lawsuit, the precedence the case may set or the outcome. His only care is not wasting anymore of hos precious time.
This post is amusing to me because I was called for jury duty as well. I have to call on Monday to see if my group is activated. I've actually wanted to be on a jury for a long time, but now after reading your story I'm a little more tentative.
It's never happened to me but a few years ago a colleagues mother was called for jury duty on what turned out to be a murder trial.
She was updating him and he was updating us, it was all very horrible, and of course she was breaking the rules by talking about it.
But ever since then I thought I wouldn't mind. Just knowing my luck it'll be a case about unpaid parking fines.
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