Today's Apocalypse Sign: In Which I'm Creeped Out

When Fox News came on tonight I about fell out of my chair at the lead story...especially after yesterday's post.

"7-month old baby dies in the heat after being locked in a car for more than 3 hours.

I was stunned and a little creeped out. Not that I feel any karmic responsibility due to my last post but more because it is not even summer yet. And yeah, caused I did somewhat predict this happening.

Here's what happened:

Oak Cliff, Dallas, TX

The mother entrusted a neighbor friend to help her out by taking her 7-month old daughter to daycare. The neighbor ran an errand and "forgot" to drop the baby at daycare (WTF???). She returned home at 9AM this morning and parked the car (with the baby still inside) with the windows rolled up. At 1PM she went back out to her car only to discover her deadly mistake.

Paramedics and police arrived but it was to late, little baby Brianna died of being left in a car during the heat of the day. And we only reached the low 80's here today.

This is so unbelievable that I have nothing else to say.

Todays Apocalypse Sign: Need For A Parenthood Test

There are probably many reasons that would/could/should justify the need for a parenthood test. That is, the fitness of one or both people to actually be a parent. I am talking about for the safety of the child (or in Kate's case, ocho ninos).

We have all read and heard about horrific things that have happened to children. If we were talking about sea turtles we would call it natural selection, but we are talking about small humans with each one having the possiblity of becoming something great (curing cancer, solving any number of the worlds problems, etc.). After all, sea turtles can only be, ya know, a sea turtle. Too much of the time it is through the bold ignorance of adults that bad things happen to children.

Invariably in most major cities there is a news story once or twice a week about child tragedy of some kind. Unfortunate accidents, while sad, happen to young and old a like. Put whatever name to that you like (fate, coincidence, God's will), it is a part of life. The preventable tragedy is the worst.

In Big D we have had our fair share of stories centered around children and bizarre behavior by adults trusted to keep them safe. But two items from the recent news have almost led me to take up a crusade for "parent fitness testing" couples BEFORE they are allowed to have kids. Seriously. Sort of a "no pass - no play" rule for adults.

Both stories share the same basic scenario - children left in vehicles.

The first one I have to say I would consider another party guilty in the second degree. The lady was spending the day driving around checking out rent houses...and left her kids in the car while she checked out the house! Each time she met the owner who did nothing about the fact she was leaving the kids in the car.

She was at one house for 45 minutes and never came out to check on them and fortunately some good citizen called the police when they saw this. In this day and age when children are stolen right off the street in the blink of an eye, there is no excuse for making it easier for child predators...oh yeah, she had left the car unlocked. In regards to the parent test: Verdict (in the words of the great Soup Nazi) "No Children for you, go to jail one year!"

The second story clearly categorizes this guy as a Moron, with a capital M. This genius decided since he had the kids for the night and he couldn't leave them home alone (of course not!) he leaves them in his car while he goes into...a strip club.

Not some upscale, valet-parking strip club but one where not all the parking lot lights work, ya know what I mean? He is in the club for three hours!!! When the cops came and he got busted, he claimed he just stopped to make a phone call. Yeah, right and several lap dances later...

This guy clearly should have had his dick nailed to a tree when he turned 18. A friend of mine claims this to be the surest form of keeping dumbasses from procreating. In this case, I might have to agree.

Fortunately all turned out alright for the children. However I can't help but think that between now and the end of September, during the baking heat of a DFW summer, at least one child will die from being left in a car. It happens every year. The test would help prevent this tragedy.

So I say keep your eyes open for your chance to be a hero because this is a nationwide problem. We have to look out for those that can't help themselves. Those of you who are parents know this.

Todays Apocalypse Sign: Yes, A Top Ten List

I thought today I would delve into something outside my main blog theme and get something out of my head that has been running around in there denting up my skull.

Once I decided to do a top ten on this subject, I quickly realized that this most likely will be a multi-part mini-theme as there are lots of...

Songs With Overt or Covert Drug Lyrics

I know top ten lists are not original and the subject most surely isn't but it is MY list in MY order and it may stimulate some memories, provoke some thoughts, and maybe stir up some controversy...who knows. Anyway, I wanted to do this to see how deep this really goes beyond the obvious songs (like "Cocaine") and once my brain latches onto a thought or a subject it runs off on its own to have fun exploring. Sooooo...

Here are the top ten for this post. Feel free to comment or get your brother to comment:

#10
      Snowblind Friend - Hoyt Axton/Steppenwolf     Drug Reference: Cocaine, whatelse?
         I first heard this song not long after Born To Be Wild came out. At the time I really didn't get it but the song had a nice melody to it and was somewhat catchy to sing a long to. Then I got it. Until recently I never new Hoyt Axton recorded this song.

#9
      Eight Miles High - The Byrds      Drug Reference: Take your pick, Pot, Heroin, LSD, etc.
         This is another one I heard when I was growing up and just liked the song for its ethereal sound. And like #10, I didn't get it at the time. it is however a keeper as I periodically listen to to this day.

#8
      Purple Haze - Jimi Hendrix        Drug Reference: LSD
         This is the album you had to hide from your parents. I know I did. This represented a whole new kind of experience, if ya know what I mean. The song just screamed anti-establishment and counter-culture. It separated the enlightened from the squares. Alas I speak too much. Known of course for that early great mis-quoted lyric '' 'scuse me while I kiss this guy". I had friends wanting to fight someone who didn't believe that was the lyric.

#7
      White Rabbit - Jefferson Airplane       Drug Reference: LSD
          With the unforgettable line "One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small, and the ones that mother gives don't do anything at all."  Pretty clear this was not Carroll's child's novel. As with most people who got into the Airplane, this song was my first flight.

#6
      Needle and Spoon - Lynerd Skynerd      Drug Reference: Heroin, obviously
          This song hit it hard, "with a needle and a spoon, take a trip to the moon." All of Skynerd's songs of that time were just rockers and I loved them all. But this one was a little intense like a shot between the eyes.

#5
      People Are Strange - The Doors       Drug Reference: LSD, peyote, etc.
          Ah...Jim Morrison...there was no hiding the intent of this song. Just review the lyrics and you can bet he was writing from experience. I am a huge Doors fan and I listened to their vinyl until it wouldn't play anymore.

#4
      Hotel California - The Eagles        Drug Reference: Heroin or none...this is a controversial one
          Most people think this song is just what it sounds like a good time California drug and sex orgy. Others believe it has to do with satanical cults and there are a couple other theorys. I side with most people. Who hasn't been drivin' late at night when this song came on and then sang every word to it? It is one of many great Eagles songs.

#3
      Cocaine - Eric Clapton          Drug Reference: Asprin...just kidding, cocaine of course
         To me Eric Clapton is one of the great musicians and guitar players. Layla is one of my all-time favorite songs and Cocaine is a close second. It has that instantly recognizable intro that just pounds your brain and runs for the whole song.

#2
      Stairway To Heaven - Led Zeppelin        Drug Reference: Hallucinogens, take your pick
          This one is another controversial one. I just loved this song so much I never really tried to decode it. Zep is the be all end all when it comes to originality, creating outside the box, and staying power of the music. I am kind of on the fence with this one after reading so much about those  lyrics from so many people. It may or may not belong on this list but it is Zep, and it is one of the greatest songs of all time for both Plant and Page...just brilliant stuff. Probably some drug involvement given the times.

#1
       Sweet Leaf - Black Sabbath       Drug Reference: Marijuana
           Loved Sabbath in this whole era (when Ozzie was really Ozzie and not the mummy he is now). When the opening cords of this song come on, it's like a punch in the gut...hard driving bass that never lets up. Ozzie was at his best vocally and the song is just mesmerizing. I listen to it frequently still.

So there you it...the first ten. I am sure i should have organized better and maybe even sub-sorted by drug type but I really didn't want to overthink it. If you have something to say, please feel free to comment.

Until next time...don't try this at home.

Todays Apocalypse Sign: Shape-Shifting Pets

This may be a sign of the apocalypse for real. I have long suspected my dog of either being possessed, bi-polar, or having a split personality. I have never been able to fully determine which of these it is.

But today while fooling around with my new Fuji FinePix point and shoot, I think I have stumbled on what is really the cause of Caesar's mental state...he is an alien shape-shifter! No shit.

The camera, as we all know, catches things the human eye misses. Today I was in the right place at the right time and caught the following action.

You decide if what you see below justifies my statement above. Take a look:

Click on the pictures to enlarge. This is necessary.

Caesar just sitting by my desk. I wanted to try the new camera and get a few shots of him. But strangely I could not get him to look directly at me. Very suspicious...

Then he kind of half turns and gives me this evil look like only he knows whats going on and there is nothing I can do about it. Still not making direct eye contact, just a furtive sideways look...

THERE! You see that! Just at the exact moment I snapped the shutter...BAM..shape-shift occurs! See how he bent time AND space. You do see it right?

Now a completely different and normal dog-like expression. Like, "What? What are you looking at? Nothing happened. Keep playing with your camera."

If there are other dogs out there like this and they are communicating on the sub-audio dog frequency, humans are in big trouble.

So get your cameras out you dog owners and see if you can catch your dog shape-shifting. I know I can't have the only one.

Will I be sleeping with one eye open now...you bet

Todays Apocalypse Sign: Scud Missile War Greecian Style

Rocket Wars Chios Greece

Picture this in your neghborhood:a quite Easter Sunday, family sitting down to dinner, the sun is setting, and then the sound of rockets flying around!

Well in Chios, Greece they have a decades old tradition where two churches fire off thousands of rockets at each other trying to be the first to hit the others bell tower. I assume there are extra points of some kind (a pound of goat cheese maybe) if you actually hit the bell and make it toll.

Residents have to cover their homes to protect against flying rockets and keep their house from catching fire. Can you get fire insurance in Chios I wonder??

Imagine a launch platform like 50 feet long with grooves in it to lay the rockets. After the rockets are all laid out, a guy walks along with a burning torch or something and lights them like hes strumming a giant guitar. Then they reload and do it again. Oh yeah, the other side is firing back at them at the same time!

Yes I know they are nothing more than giant bottle rockets, but the first time I saw the video (and I watched it on the news and several different Youtube vids) I thought I was seeing a renactment of the first Gulf war. (At least the scud missle part.) Then I realized these people are just friggn' nuts.

However, I could not find any documented death toll, at least not of any people. I am sure some houses have burned.

Oh well, as they say: Light it Up!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Falling From The Sky

Drunk Bird

You know, the further you go in life the less you "hear for the first time". However, this week, I heard for the first time about the cedar waxwings and their penchant for yaupon berries.

I have heard about apocalyptic signs like plagues of locust and toads raining out of the sky, but this was a first.

In Garland, TX (which is where I live believe it or not, for 20 years) we were subject to birds flying along and just falling out of the sky. Streets in some neighborhoods were littered with dead and dying cedar waxwings. One busy highway had birds falling out of the sky onto the windshields of fast moving cars. Nothing like that to get your heart pumping on the way to work.

Apparently the berries of the yaupon bush are too tempting for these birds migrating back to Canada and they cannot stop eating them. The fermenting berries actually make these birds drunk and they pass out while flying. All the dead birds were found with mouthfuls of these berries.

Heaven help us.


I have missed updating on the STM. Which means I missed both the 10,000 follower and 5,000,000 hit mark. So this is where he is today:

STM Update

10,078 Followers

5,137,833 Unique Visitors

A Today Show appearance...the gift that keeps on giving.

Until next time...if you are driving through north Texas during the next month, watch for birds falling from the sky.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Last Round Up

I heard the other day that two states (Missouri and Tennessee, I believe) are actually voting to allow horses to be slaughtered and sold for meat...to grocery stores, restaurants, etc. This is their solution to horse over-population. I for one am appalled at this train of thought. Fire ant slaughter, locust and grass hopper slaughter, hell, mosquito slaughter, are all fine by me...but horses for food?? No way.

 Senseless killing of horses because of over-population seems like going the extremist  measure first. I would urge all citizens of those two states to write their state officials and voice a collective displeasure over this issue. As bad as that is, I am a little shocked to learn that the state I have called home for the last 30 years has two of only three operating horse slaughter houses in the US.

And since I live in Dallas it is even worse because one of the plants is in metro Ft. Worth and the other in Kaufman, TX about an hour southeast of Dallas. Both of them are owned by foreign interests (one Belgian and one French). They slaughter horses here and ship the meat to other parts of the world.

And now for the worst part of all, these are not the over-populated, or sick, injured or aged animals that are headed for the "glue factory", oh no, each year tens of thousands of healthy young animals are slaughtered for their meat as a food source. This is a delicacy business, like shark finning. It is outrageous!

A couple statistics from the Just Say Whoa! site:

                               Every 5 minutes an American horse is slaughtered for human consumption

                               Over 25,000 horses died in slaughter houses during 2007

On this site there is a link to a letter you can send to your congressman expressing your concern.

My wife and I are both huge animal lovers. We tolerate no mistreatment or abuse. There are even shows on TV we will not watch because of this. Killing horses for food is just plan wrong. Agree with me or not.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Down In 30 Seconds

Yesterday was a sad day in Dallas, TX. The iconic Texas Stadium was imploded at 7:07AM. I knew this event was coming for a couple months and even told my wife we should get up early and head over to watch it. Dumbass thought on my part.

Sometimes we should be thankful for Mr. Murphy. Usually his Law just jacks things up beyond all belief. But yesteday, we did not turn out for this spectacle because at the last minute my wife had to work AND I realized that he final round of the Masters was on. So we did not go.

Why was this good fortune? (I really was looking forward mainly to getting some great camera and video shots of both the implosion and the people there.) Well, first of all it cost $25 a car to park in the only lot that was made available for the viewing. Second, they opened the lot at like 1:30AM so, you guessed, the hardy partiers could have one last tailgate bash for like 5 hours! This ended up being a gigantic outdoor party with plenty of beer and alcohol (and I am sure other *items* as some of the people that were interviewed were multi-influenced looking).

There were at least 8-10,000 people involved in this melee. Ex-Cowboy's cheerleaders (some who had not aged well) were also there in their own little clique. And after the stadium came down many of the people were wearing masks so the whole thing (out of context) looked like a very large grouped of drunk, stoned, etc. people milling around during a terrorist or anthrax attack. Funny how my mind works.

Anyway, it was kind of sad to see the stadium come down. Having lived in Dallas for the last 20 years and driving by the stadium almost every day for much of that, it is going to be weird not seeing it there any more. I know I attended one pre-season game, one playoff game, and one concert I remember (Pink Floyd). I never tailgated in the lot but I heard it was a great time so I am sorry I missed one of those.

I know my favorite team (Packers) and player (Brett Favre) never won there in 9 tries...for that, a piece of me is glad to see it go. But the history and everything to do with that stadium made it a landmark that some how should have endured. Unfortunately there was little use for it beyond its intended purpose when it was built. The hole in the roof while being its singular oddity, made the facility useless for other events requiring good weather and air conditioning (it's a hot mofo in Dallas!).

So, built in two years, used for 37 years, down in 30 seconds. It was pretty incredible to watch...on TV. At least I didn't have to get up until 6:30 AM to watch. Below are pictures and video. It was pretty cool that an 11-year old kid won a contest so he was the one to push the button that brought down Landry's House.

Enjoy......

Rest In Peace...

Today's Apocalypse Sign: They Did The Right Thing???

I was absolutely stunned this morning to hear on the news that the young man from my post of April 6th was cleared by the school superintendent to return to class on Monday. Maybe there is some hope for common sense after all, or maybe I carry an extreme amount of influence. One way or the other it is something to feel good about.

Since I haven't updated in a while:

ALERT ALERT ALERT

STM Update
9901 Followers
4,801,191 Unique Visitors

The only question now is...10,000 or 5,000,000 first?? What are your thoughts?

Today's Apocalyptic Sign: Creepy Children's Books

Well after the heavy commentary in the last couple of posts I believe it is time for another round of Who Thinks Up This Shit. Actually I guess it is the first round since I have never posted anything with that title.

Anyway, I stumbled upon (and I guess that is the reason someone started a site called StumbleUpon) as we all do many times a day, something quite interesting and yet extremely disturbing at the same time. Everything below came from oddee. Be warned, if you go to this site and have never been there before, prepare to lose several hours of your life (and distort some brain cells too). It is addicting and with over 5 million vistors a month that should be proof enough.

The list below are real childrens books you can buy on Amazon. Seriously. The first one, you need to go to Amazon and look at the back cover of the book.

We begin with:

What else!

One look at this book should tell you it will scar a kid for life. Show him the back cover and therapy will be in his future. Monkeys make me laugh, I have said that before. This just looks scary.
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Whoa...whoa...whoa! This is the first in a long line of children's books about poop. Everything about this should literally scare the crap outta any kid...wait, problem solved...I guess. And what is with the supportive dinosaur toilet paper holder?? Is the kid holding on to keep from falling in the toilet? Disturbing rating: a full 5 out of 5!

Live from the Big House!

How to spend time with Daddy doing time. Haven't the kids been traumatized enough? Does this teach kids what NOT to carry to a prison visit, no shank material, no saws, no cakes with saws, no smokes. I am sure this guys kids have already figured out that Dad's got a problem.
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This oughta be good..

This book deals with you-know-what...SEX. And kids being introduced to where babies come from and how they are made using words like "penis" and "vagina". And just to be sure the point gets across, there are plenty of cartoonish illustrations and explicit pictures.
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Contains every bunny suicide, ever

If you buy this book and read it to your kids, consider yourself an unfit parent and turn yourself in now! I don't get this at all. However, I would probably find this book extremely funny.
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Oh yeah, this will be good...

Second in the Poop book line...

The picture is clearer on the site but the most disurbing part of this book cover is not the wolf in a lab coat saying "Yum" to a steaming turd but rather the sporty golf attire and beret adorning said steaming turd. Senor Caca indeed!
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Sure it is.....

Well the book starts right off with a bang..."Jackie wakes up late at night to find her parents smoking pot'" This book is a childs story of marijuana. Sounds like a book that was written in the '60's. I guess as long as it teaches them how not to get caught...wait a minute, just NO!
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Gotta have a sperm story...

Most of the time you don't want to know where it goes. Although I love the custom goggles that keeps Willy's vision clear so he can see his target...whatever that may be! Be free Willy!
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So there you have it, childrens books that may, just may, account for some of society's issues today. There are many, many more on the site that will just make you go WTF???

I hope you have been entertained!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Texas, Handguns, Pickups a Bad Combination

In Texas there is one thing most small towns can claim: everyone owns a handgun and most people drive a pick up truck. But if you mix those two things with a high school senior trying to get a baseball scholarship it can be a bad combination.

Brandon Hyles is a high school senior in Maypearl, TX. Located about 45 minutes south of Dallas (where I live). It is a small town where you never hear about anything happening. Sound familar? Aren't those always the words used in cases like I am about to describe? Of course they are.

Brandon's dad is an ex-firefighter, hunter, and all around good guy according to everyone who knows him. Brandon is a pitcher on the school baseball team, hunter, owns a pick up truck, and is an all around good kid just trying to get a scholarship to play small college baseball. They are the all-American family.

But circumstances have a way of derailing even the most idyllic of stories. In this case the jury of society is sharply divided on what happened a few weeks ago.

Brandon went to school same as every other day. He was in class as he always was. At some point during this day he was pulled out of class to have his truck searched. The reason: the schools drug sniffing dog had tagged his truck. (Why does this tiny community where nothing ever happens have a drug sniffing dog in the first place? Sign of the times??)

Brandon, not having the fainest idea what the hell is going on, is taken to his truck to unlock it for searching. The school security search his vehicle and find a holstered, unloaded handgun under the drivers seat. Brandon is stunned when they pull it out. He is immediately suspended.

Now there are 11 weeks of school left. He is not in class with his fellow seniors. He is not allowed to play baseball for the small college scouts that have come to see him and others on the team. His future is fading fast along with his hopes of a college scholarship.

His dad comes forward to explain that the night before he had gone hunting (in Texas you can hunt SOMETHING any time of the year!) for wild pigs. He had put the handgun unloaded under the driver's seat of his son's truck when he left out. Unfortunately dad had a successful hunt. The wild game had been placed in the back of the pickup to bring home and butcher. Dad forgot to take out the unloaded handgun when he got home.

Brandon goes to school the next day as usual and the scent of the kill from the night before attracts the drug sniffing dog and gets him all yapping and foamy. There were no drugs, only the unloaded handgun which was registered to Brandon's dad and claimed as such. Brandon had no knowledge it was under the seat of the truck. There was no ammo anywhere in the truck. Brandon is suspended.

Last week they had a hearing of the school board. Everyone in town including the entire baseball team rallied in silent support. No decision was rendered. All Brandon wants to do is get back to school and baseball with his team mates. This is supposed to be the best time of his youth and he is left twisting in the wind.

Now in most peoples eyes the fact that the MISD has a Zero Tolerance policy about weapons on campus (and I don't blame any school for this due to events of the last decade) is enough to hang their hat on for permanent suspension which may lead to Brandon not graduating. And I get that Zero Tolerance sounds like there is little room to wiggle. But I would be a horrible administrator, judge, jurist, etc. because of my common sense and "judging each case on its own merits" mentality.

I have read several stories and comments about how the language in the ISD's policies dictate what leeway the Board or Superintendent has. Words such as "shall" indicate no wiggle room and words like "may" create an avenue for the "right thing" to be done. The rift on this one is as I said, sharply divided.

So now I am the arbiter in this case. Agree or not. But this is what I say.

I come from a long line of good fortune in my youth. Much like Pat Tillet who skated on some close ones, I too look back and say, "how the hell did I not (get killed, go to jail, get framed, etc.) for doing something that seemed like a good idea at the time. I have had second chances even later on in life. I have turned out alright, generally speaking.

So in the spirit of paying my good fortune forward, as I sit in judgement of this case, I say cut the freakin' comedy and let the kid finish school, get a scholarship, and become a good citizen. THIS is one of those opportunities for someone to grow some balls and say we are not going to destroy another "youth of America". Enough of those happen every day. Let's allow this kid an opportunity to pay it forward himself at some future crossroad in his life.

I understand rules, regulations, policies, procedures but when all the facts (and there are very few to consider) are weighed, this is what we call no harm no foul. Brandon was not writing dark demonic thoughts in his Facebook or MySpace page. He was not dressing like the grim reaper when he went to school (see Columbine). He was not in a gang or burning cats for entertainment with friends. None of the normal "hang 'em from the highest tree" activities were going on here.

His dad went hunting, his dad killed a pig, the truck smelled like a meal to a dog, an unloaded gun was accidentally left under the seat, and one of the good kids is about to have his life shattered. What horrendous words to hear when they are describing your son...life shattered. His dad could not feel any worse.

Let's be real about this and put the Hyles family back together. Let Brandon finish high school, play baseball, go to college, and from there who knows where he might end up. But it will all be good.

And to all you closet Gestapo out there who have written about the downfall of society if things like this are excused and secretly believe everything is black and white, I say:

Fuck You. Watch This.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: United (Police) State of New York

As proof that my long-term memory is still largely intact, I can state confidently I still remember my grade school years. Even the fact that I was in love with my first grade teacher...while I was in first grade. When I went to school we had wooden desks. Maps that were drawn in the 1600's I think, and big sucking pipes in the wall to clean erasers, vacuum the floor and suck your classmates personal belongings off to some faraway, unkown land.

We didn't have computers, cameras, or any kind of security measures that I knew of. Big old box speakers on the wall above the chalkboard started each day with the Pledge Of Allegiance led by the principal. Penal punishment was carried out by Mr Fleanor, the seventh grade teacher, who (I guess by drawing staws) was pronounced the Paddler of Harter Elementary School. (You know the paddle with the one-inch holes drilled in it to reduce aerodynamic drag?)

Corporal punishment usually occurred once or twice a week and you could hear it throughout the school. I believe they must have had the intercom turned on in some fashion because you really could hear every whack. It brought the school to a moment of silence when ever you heard that sound.

There were relatively few "bullies" and no cliques or Mean Girls or bootstrapped, goth looking, weapon toting neo-Nazi imitaters. I don't know if I ever saw the police at our school except for the one really creepy "educational" film about child abduction. To say it scared the shit of of me about ever thinking of talking to strangers is an understatement. I can close my eyes and remember the haunting music and the opening scene that seemed to go on forever of a lone leaf floating down a stream and then what looked like a little girl's red tennis shoe in the stream stops the leaf. From there I think my subconcious has locked away the rest of the film. Parents and kids attended together. No popcorn.

What I remember most is the rules were simple and teachers were judge, jury, and executioner (Mr Fleanor was the executioner for all things physical). The thing you feared the most was getting sent home because then you knew you were in for an ass-whippin'. Yes, your dad could still use the belt without fear of some future Child Protective Services agent being called out.


Anyway....that is just some background material.


As I mentioned above, we had wooden one-piece desks...the kind you slide into from one side leaving you only one way of exit. If the teacher was standing beside your desk (the open side) you were in effect imprisoned. The desk top lifted up and the cavernous desk bottom held all your treasures, notebooks and school books. Up until seventh grade you had one teacher, one class room, one desk for the entire school year. When the teacher rearranged the classroom, your desk went with you. That teacher taught every subject you had that year.

One of the things that we did almost every year (even under the threat of being turned over to the Paddler) was to carve our name, initals, something, into the wooden desk top, somehwere. Obviously we couldn't carve a giant etching in the middle of the desk (it would made it hard to write on and you might as well have put a sign on your head that said "Whip MY Ass".

No these were subtle but permanant legacys for the next years class to marvel at. At least that is what we thought. Later down the road we found out that as each school year ended, the custodian of the school would tag the desks that needed refinishing before the next school year. Bummer for the budding artists in the class.

Suffice it to say that never were the police called, a student handcuffed, or taken to jail while their mother was forbidden to go with them. Ours was a true case of the school handling their own discipline and the parents were generally glad for the daytime re-enforcement of the way they handled the kids at home.

BUT...flash forward to the present...

In Queens, NY, on February 1st, 2010, a 12-year old 7th grade student was led from school in handcuffs after drawing a "doodle" on her desk with erasable marker! You may have heard of this since it happened two months ago but now Alexa Gonzalez's mom is suing the New York City Education Department for $1 million in damages.

I watched the video of the mother and daughter being interviewed and in my humble opinon this whole thing is bullshit.

Once she was caught, the teacher and an assistant principal physically hauled her ass to the dean's office. The the safety officials from the school searched her pockets and then they called the police. This is all claiming to be standard protocol in matters of, are you ready, creating graffiti on school grounds!

Yeah, that's right...the "procedure" in this case was NOT to evaluate the whole situation and make a logical decision, but to call the police and have this little girl arrested in front of all her classmates and hauled out of school in handcuffs. I guess when you talk about no grey area, this fits the bill.

WTF!!!!

Are you kidding me? This girl is as non-anti-establishment as they come. Her mother was not even allowed to accompany her daughter to the jail (where she sat for several hours handcuffed to a pole) and was told to go home and wait for a call.

In the end the po-po admitted that common sense should have prevailed and this never should have happened. How many times do we hear that AFTER a dumbass act??

Alex is now required to perform (by order of family court) 8 hours of community service and ordered to write a book report and essay about what she has learned from this.

Oh yeah, and what did she doodle that was so criminal:

"I love my friends Abby and Faith" "Lex was here 2/1/10" and a smiley face! Again, in erasable marker.

A squirt bottle and a papertowel and this would have been over. Nooooooooooooo...let's take police officers from fighting real crime in New York City and waste their time with this crazy-ass shit! Taxpayers...be proud of where these tax dollars went.

A sign of the Apocalypse...I think this qualifies.

Tomorrow, Texas.... a hand gun....and a pickup truck. You'll love this one too!

Until then, please thank the next person you see showing some common sense...apparently it isn't all that common so appreciate it when you see it.

Sleep with one eye open, gripping your pillow tight.