Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Cutest Girl In The World

Here are a few shots of the new little girl in my life. She is growing up so fast (9weeks old and we've had her 3 weeks). Can't believe she already weighs 5 pounds. She will melt your heart. Click to enlarge for best viewing.

Cornelia at rest (finally)

Kind of in a sleep-stupor

And now she's awake and ready for action

Bad Shot from my bad cell phone camera

Sorry I missed the weekend graphs last Sunday but work has been a grind for the last couple weeks. Should be back to normal shortly.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: I Take Time Out To Actually Post...Monday Minute

Who was your high school Sweet Heart?

I think it was Mary Jane...nope, pretty sure it was Mary Jane...ahhh Mary Jane

What is your favorite vegetable to eat?

I likes me a scallion...sometimes even a rapscallion will do

Do you plan on dressing up for Halloween, if yes, what do you have in mind?

After the last fiasco no one that knows me ever, and I mean ever, asks that question of me

Are you a reality show junkie? If so, what is your guilty pleasure?

Amazingly not...I like Dealiest Catch, Flipping Out, Ice Road Truckers, that's about it. Seriously. Check out my post on this subject >>>HERE.


What year did you graduate high school?

To see for yourself, go HERE

Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Mobile Monday Minute

Okay, I am a little confused how the Monday Minute got a new button and new location but, well, I'll roll with it.



*Favorite 80s flick?


The 80's are a little hazy, but one I can always count on is Top Gun. "I feel the need...the need for speed"!



*One genre of music needs to be banned. Which genre?

Curiously I could do with a little less thrash metal...and anything with kazoos. No sounds that I could make without prior training can possibly be called music.

Check out one of my new favorite bands courtesy of RA:



I have downloaded all their music that is online...as one commenter said, "sounds like Elvis and Johnny Cash had a love child that was raped by Metallica." What a description!

*All time favorite candy?

Almond Joy of course! What kid doesn't love a candy that looks like a pair of boobs with huge brown nipples that tastes good!



*How 'flawed' is your driving record?

Not nearly as much as it should be...I drive under a lucky star. Probably shouldn't have said that...dammit!



*What was your high school mascot?

The Sailors. Sounds like gay pirates right? Yeah we played most sports that way...lay down, roll over and take it up....



What color socks are you wearing?

Skin colored...really freaks people out!


That's all for this week!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Newer And Funnier Weekend Graphs!!!

Well this is exciting! Just when you thought that the Weekend Graphs couldn't get any funnier...they did!

Here is this weeks edition that will have you rolling on the floor. Pass along the humor!


see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs

Here is one I made. It was a request from Alex in a comment on last weeks graphs. Cell Phone Users:




I hope these made your day!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Oh God...Walmart Is Just Too Easy!

Image via WikipediaIt is ironic (and a little stupid on my part) that even after reading the Badass Geek's post about the horror of a "quick shopping trip" and reading Dick's Flashback Friday Post along a similar vein, my wife and I decided to get the grocery shopping out of the way before the weekend. We hit the local Super Walmart at 8:30PM yesterday (Friday night).

Let me set the scene:

* My wife HATES grocery shopping, especially at the super Walmart
* My wife hates loud squeaky shopping carts,  especially when deaf people push them all around the store
* My wife hates waiting in the checkout line, but she is an expert at unloading the cart correctly on the conveyor
* My wife has a burning desire to run slow-walking, fat bastards over with a loaded shopping cart.
* Both my wife and I hate people who are not aware of their surroundings
* I wished to God last night for a pair of glasses with photographic capability...Please Lord!

 Soooo we arrive at the store. List made. Just a few things. In and out like shopping ninjas. Hmmmm the parking lot seems to be a-bustle with activity. We park and make our move to the entrance. All the while reviewing the game plan..."no detours", "nothing not on the list", "no aisles we need nothing from". We break the huddle and hit the cart rack.

Problems already. Two enemy squads (families) block our quick attempt to grab a cart and get rolling. Oh yeah, my wife HATES waiting for anything when we are in a hurry. The families move out and we get our cart. Enter, turn left and hit the fruit and veggie section for the 4 or 5 things we need there.

As we head down the veggie section it is clearly apparent that this is NOT the time of day the beautiful people shop Walmart. In fact I dare say that many a trailer and nearly-condemned apartment is vacant right now as their occupants are DIRECTLY in front of us. Some people think that just because it is dark outside others can't see what they are wearing once inside the store...WRONG!

Why all the super-duper sized women believe in their heart they can still wear clothes I suspect they couldn't wear in high school amazes me. And after having 5 or 6 kids ranging in age from 1 to 6, they really can't do it! Painted on pants and shirts that do not even come down to the top of their pants is not a good look anywhere but especially not in a grocery store. The only rolls I want to see are in the bakery department.

We proceed through the rest of the fruit and veggie area and then the first one is heard...eee eee eee eee the sound of the one squeaky wheel cart. My wife stops dead in her tracks and looks at me with laser eyes and pursed lips and says, "you've got to be kidding me". The direction of the sound and its target area are undeterminable.

We head down the first aisle hearing that sound getting closer and we can not figure out which direction we need to go to be moving away from it. Then we get to the end of the aisle and turn left and there is the lady pushing the squeaky cart! I tell my wife just ignore her she is moving away from our flight path. No can do...my wife has to stop, put her fingers in her ears and stare at this lady while she says (just short of loud enough to be heard by the lady) "you seriously cannot hear that?" I just kept walking to the next aisle. We are having fun now!

The rest of the food side of the store was a blur of large people with large families believing they were the only ones in the store and oblivious to the fact our cart was about up their ass. It was every bit the gauntlet of a boot camp punishment exercise.

Then we reached the far end of the food section, the dairy and frozen foods. Once we turned the corner, the symphony of squeaky wheel carts suddenly begins. There are carts in front, behind, an aisle over all squeaking in different pitches. My wife keeps moving even when I stop for soymilk and butter (silently laughing to myself for knowing she was about to go ballistic). This truly was torture worthy of Gitmo!

We then headed back towards the front of the store stopping at the ends of the aisles for the sundry items  (no chance in hell of navigating down them with a cart) and grab the few items we needed there. Once again the original squeaky wheel cart lady is back. Curiously she does not look like she has put anything in the cart in the 20 minutes since we first saw her. I asked myself what the hell an older black lady in hospital scrubs would be doing at Walmart just pushing around an almost empty squeaky wheel cart on a Friday night??

The food part was done and now we need to cross the hazardous clothing and houewares minefield to get a shower curtain and some dog care items. We split up to finish this nightmare as quick as possible. I went to grab mouthwash and my wife headed to the pet section. I then made a fateful left turn and entered the danger zone directly behind the check out lines. What I saw, and clearly had failed to calculate, is how long the lines get when you are shopping for 6-8 people per tribe...and they are all in line with you!

I zigged and zagged through the human mass shrugging off wayward ankle-biters as I moved like a pro running back to the aisle where my wife was. It was during this time I realized another huge flaw in choosing this night to shop...it was NoTax Back To School weekend in Texas! Everybody and their kid were at this store!

I ran in to a solid immovable wall of humanity clogging every square inch of the school supplies aisles! WTF! Now I knew trouble was brewing...once I got my wife and we had to head back through that mob (with a cart this time) her barely contained irritation could boil over. I find her and warn her. It took over ten minutes to navigate over to the checkout line (of which they only had half the the lanes open). The whole while, the front of our cart was millimeters away from a lady's ass that looked like two pigs fighting under a blanket. If she had stopped short I know the front of the cart would have crumpled. She was moving at glacial speed with her 4 kids clammering about. This thought amused me.

Now we have to stand in line...behind the first lady who had the squeaky wheel cart!! She had managed to fill it to the brim since we last saw her AND now she had a stroller with a baby in it she had not had before? My wife was not amused and did not see the irony. And then to top it all off this was next to us (this is when I prayed for the glasses camera):

This is a bad picture but it is an elderly lady dressed, I presume, like a high school mascot! My wife grabbed my phone out of my hand and said, "I have to get a picture of this".

This was a long tour of duty.

The rest of the night went rather smoothly.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: One Less Dumbass In Texas...

Patrick Sharp is no more.


This genius decided on observing the old Indian code of the west, "Today is a good day to die". However his method and timing were a tad bit different.

On Tuesday of this past week our boy wonder here, thought that the best and most productive use of his time that morning was to drive his pick up truck towing a trailer loaded with ammonium nitrate and wood chips to the McKinney, TX police station and set it on fire. Just the truck mind you...he set the truck on fire as he was getting out of it.

As he stepped out of the truck he started firing rounds from an assault rifle directly into the front of the police station building. And just for good measure the hundreds of rounds of ammo left in the burning truck started firing off in all directions. And his groceries of war included a shotgun and handgun in addition to the assault rifle. The police would later find a cache of weapons back at the double-wide.

Now the plan apparently was for the truck to burn and draw the cops out from the station house. Then the trailer would explode sending firey debris everywhere. Then he could mow down the cops from the field across from the station while hiding in the trees. Oh yeah, there was also a community college full of registering students nearby.

In reality almost none of that happened, except he did manage to burn up his truck. This station was fairly new and since it was built post-911 it was constructed in such a way that no vehicles could pull up and park close to the building. The actual construction of the building was also designed to repel a frontal small arms assault. The way the windows were constructed limited the ability for direct gunfire damage.

He did manage to get into the wooded area across from the station to provide excellent sniper exercise for the police officers. Fortunately this guy apparently could not take the failure of his Rambo-esque plan and promptly plugged himself in the head. At least none of the officers had to worry about their conscience for taking a life that day.

I am not excited this happened just north of where I live. His roommate (who was out of town) was stunned when he found out what had happened. There was a lot of interviewing of friends and neighbors saying how shocking this was and how he never had a bad word for anyone, etc.

Here's the rest of the story:



I'll sleep a little easier now, knowing there is one less dumbass living in a double-wide in my area of Texas.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Why Didn't I Think Of That: Part Deux

This is currently the funniest thing I have found on the internet. IF you are a fan of the Twilight series, too bad, it is still funny shit...in a mocking way.

So girls, if you have given yourself to team Edward, this is for you.

Twilight Cycles
Don't let that time interfere with your relationship with your vampire boyfriend.

Twilight Cycles from Brandon Routh

This has been a public service announcment from Apocalypse Now.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: It's Monday Again Already???

And here's tonights meet and greet.....no, that's not right...it's the Monday Minute1
If you could have plastic surgery, would you? If so, what would you get done?

You mean like be covered in plastic...hell ya! I'd get a lot a shit done in my body condom! And stay dry and disease free! Wait, that didn't come out right AT ALL! Still can you imagine...Plastic Man! Oh, you meant something completely different, didn't ya?

What laws have you broken?

Way too many to list...plus I'm in witness protection so I can't talk about that concealed weapon I carry.


What is your quirkiest habit?

I load my gun left-handed...and I'm a natural righty! People only make fun of it once...just once.

If you only had 3 songs to listen to for the rest of your life what would they be?

This minute they would be:

Metallica - Master Of Puppets
Zeppelin - Achilles Last Stand
Tool - Aenima

 Ask me in ten minutes and I'll give ya three more!

How often do you have sex?

"That depends on what your definition of "have" is...(in my best Bill Clinton voice)"

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And that's all the wackiness for tonight!

Today's Apocalyse Sign: Shape-Shifting Dog Has New Partner

Remember the Devil Dog from this post? Last Saturday night my wife had a surprise for me. She had told me about this "surprise" on Thursday night after we got back from the IMAX version of Inception. She cannot keep surprises very well so I said, "why don;'t you just give it to me Friday night". She said she couldn't until Saturday. I was tired and hot (the IMAX apparently will NOT cool the theater when there are only 15 people watching the movie) so I quickly moved past this subject onto something else. I gave the surprise no more thought.

Saturday I worked and she had a dive class to teach at a local lake all day. When I got home I remembered her statement about a "surprise" and started my mental rundown of the usual suspects. Nothing detailed but just kind of general brainstorming. Was she buying me something (hope not, couldn't afford it), were friends coming over (hope not again as the work day was long and I was bummed about Tiger playing like shit at the Bridgestone), did she win some radio call-in contest, did she win a scratch-off lottery ticket, was her boss paying my way for our Fiji trip next year, etc. It was running close to 7PM and she hadn't called yet so I got on the Internet for a while.

I had not been at the computer for more than 10 minutes when I walked out our back door to check on a noise I heard outside. Finding nothing, I turned around to come back in and saw the gag sign we have up outside the back door that says Beware Of Dog.

Now I don't know if any of you get what most people call premonitions or intuitive flashes, but I had a huge one right then! I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was bringing home a new dog. To be specific a Boston Terrier puppy. I went back inside and told our other Boston that mama was bringing home a new addition to the family. I immediately begain thinking like it was already there...what are we going to name it ( running names through my mind), how are we going to coordinate the care during the day, how are we going to afford another pet to feed (my dogs only get the best organic food and vitamins), most importantly was I up to the grind of cleaning up for the duration of pre-outside potty training?

I'm tellin' ya, this was like California-psychic clear to me! A DOG WAS GOING TO BE IN MY LIFE THAT NIGHT!!! It was really kind of freaky.

An hour later as I was sitting in the lounger watching TV with my back to the door. I hear my wife come in. She doesn't answer when I say, "hi, honey". Instead she walks up and lays this on my chest:

6-Week Old Cornelia

Already she is sticking her tongue out at me!

Devil-Dog Caesar

Okay, Here is a fairer picture of Caesar that night, a little miffed.

When I told her about my sure-fired premonition, she thought for sure one of my co-workers had spilled the beans about it since she had been working on this for over a month. I told her to ask Caesar cause he knew the truth...it was still kind of freaky.

Now we have a 5-year old, 29-pound male BT and a (currently) 7-week old, 1 1/2 pound female BT!

This will be fun!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Weekend Graphs...AGAIN!

Once again there is a little something for everyone. I find these amusing no matter how many times I read them. Get your week off to a good start by having a good laugh!

Enjoy...



see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs


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see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs


see more Funny Graphs

Instead of posting graphs made by others...Next week I would like to actually make custom graphs based on YOUR input. Leave your ideas in the comments. Any that are used will be attributed to you. This oughta be fun!

Today's Apocalypse SIgn: Monday Minute Time!

"There is no try, only do"

Well this Monday Minute session looks right up my alley. I must say I have waited all day for this minute of my time (well actually 5 minutes). Here goes:



What was your "oh no, I'm turning into my Mom/Dad" moment?


When someone in their 30's called me sir...and not in a way that suggested I had just been knighted. Bastard!


What current commercial do you find the most annoying/funny?

I posted this a few days ago and I am still done with it...all those freakin' male enhancement ads. Done I say!



If you could only eat one color food for the rest of your life what would it be?

BLUE. Ever since I heard the joke about no blue food (I think it was George Carlin) I have been on a quest to add more blue to my diet. This would be one sure way to get there. God I love blueberries...


What is your current Facebook/Myspace/Twitter status?

On life support...I think these were just fads of mine to experiment with. The genie is out of the bottle and ya can't go back. When people I didn't want to remember from 20 or 30 years ago starting popping up with friend requests...I was out. Now I barely go on Facebook, and when I do I am like a covert Facebook Ninja...in and out before you know I'm there. I only joined Twitter to stalk  follow Natalie Gulbis and Morgan Pressell.



F, Marry, Kill from this list below. Women pick from the men, men pick from the women.

Way too easy...fuck 'em all!!!! I would call it the "Goldilocks Experience"...This one's too Gay, this one's too Old, this one's just Right!



•Snookie (from Jersey Shore), Ellen DeGeneres, Betty White



And that's all she wrote for tonight! Now I gotta go watch Big Break Sandals Resort and answer question number 5 all over again for that show.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Weekend Graphs Are Here!

This week there is a little something for everyone, the weird, the twisted, and Windows. Remember to share these with family, friends, and co-workers to bring a ray of happiness into their tiny little lives.

I now present these graphs as there were intended:



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Today's Apocalypse Sign: Why Didn't I Think Of That!

If I could tell you how many great ideas I have been late to the party with...well it would pretty much be all of them, ever. But no matter, I have been scooped once again!

While in the local Walmart the other night doing a his and hers tandem-Wednesday-night-grocery-shopping rarity... breathe... I found the latest and great thing. This is it! (sorry for the cheap phone pix)

Individual portions of the spices needed to make the dish!

And...the recipe and cooking instructions on the back!

Let's count the ways this is great:

1. For $2.28 you get the spices you need for this meal rather than like $20 for the large bottles of each spice.

2. They are pre-measured so no trying to figure out the difference between tablespoon and teaspoon.

3. The recipe is on a sturdy card you can keep for future use.

4. Even a cooking savant like me can probably do this right!

I'll be making this bad boy Sunday night, I'll let you know how it turns out.

Oh yeah, and I'm really pissed I missed the genius boat again with this simple idea. Maybe I'm too complex

and need to dumb myself down a bit...do ya think?

What great ideas have YOU had just a little too late??

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Things I'm Done With

I woke up Sunday morning to my alarm clock (WTF!) and immediately heard something that made me want to hurl my clock radio across the room. That inspirational moment led to this post. I got up, went to the computer and started jotting down things "I am done with".

I now present those things in no particular order:

1. "It is what it is" I swear if I hear this one more time I am going to take a life. These five words are for people who cannot hold a discussion or even a general conversation. They are not even a truism! In fact, what the fuck does this even mean??? Example: ME: "Dude, your cat got run over by a car." DUMBASS FRIEND: "I know man, it is what it is." I am lividly pissed just typing this one. Most things are not a resolution to what they currently are. In fact this phrase is a sign of giving up or in. Get away from me.
2. Morning breath denial. I am so tired of watching commercials, shows, movies, etc. where people just waking up hold a five minute conversation 1-inch from each other. I know it's acting but it is giving real people the okay to do it on a daily basis. Get real and just have them lay back talk to the ceiling like normal people.
3. People who mistreat children. This is a no brainer but after hearing something new week after week I have reached the end. Here in Dallas this last week some father (and I use that term very loosely) was sentenced to 99 years for his crime. The crime? He locked his three kids in a hotel bathroom for a year! Read the story here. People like this should be euthanized, just like the grizzly bear that attacked that family last week. At least the bear did what bears do protecting their cubs. This piece of shit told police he didn't know how he woke up in bed having sex with the 11-year old girl. Some people are not fit to be parents or apparently, alive.
4. Motley Crue's 'Girls, Girls, Girls". I never want to hear this song again. The radio still plays it so much I am starting to feel physically ill when I hear it. I don't even want to hear it while drunk in a strip club...not that that would even happen. Again.
5. Male enhancement ads. How gay do you have to be to do a commercial like this, "I remember rooming with 4 girls in med school and listening to them talk about their men. It's not length they wanted it was thickness and width." And then based on that "scientific study" he says he developed a product that will do just that. WTF times 10!  And apparently you cannot patent this snake oil because there are at least 15 ads for this stuff on the radio everyday. I must say I always did enjoy the smiling Bob commercials on TV...they found the plainest guy and the ugliest women to use in those spots and it always made me laugh.
6. The BP Oil Mess. How come the smartest people on the planet couldn't come up with a solution faster than 3+ months into this disaster. And now it seems people in BP and the government are already starting to say: the oil is disappearing, fishing grounds are open again, mother nature will clean up after us like she always has, etc. Please stop bullshitting us we are not ALL stupid and we don't feel better about it.
7. Pussy-footing around with Osama Bin Laden. I recently watched a show on how we have tried TEN TIMES to literally assassinate this wackjob. We missed, botched, stopped short (wasn't that George's dad's move?), or gave up each time. The first attempt was an L-shaped assault of Bin Laden's 3 car convoy. Simple and to the point, Noooooooooo, they fuckin' missed! They shot the hell out of the vehicles, blew up the one NOT carrying Osama, and could not. even. shoot. out. the. tires on the other two!!!! It was the funniest sad thing I ever watched. Someone needs to come up with a plan, see it through, and don't worry, the collateral damage will be forgotten about in a shorter time period than the war has taken so far. In the words of Larry the Cable guy, "Gitter done!"
8. Lindsey Lohan. Nuff said.

I am sure there is much more that I am done with, but I guess that will have to be for another day.

What are some of the things you're done with?? Let me know.

Today's Apocalypse Sign: I Expose Myself To The World (for Lucy)

I have always been hypercritical of my photography, especially shots that I thought were somewhat good. So tonight I cast that fear aside and post my photography for all to see!

The original photo I had as a header to this blog came from an afternoon, late December walk, in northern Ohio circa 2008. I was home for Christmas and with snow on the ground I wanted to get some shots out behind my mother's house where a triple set of tracks separates two neighborhoods. I wanted to shoot some black and white and some limited color shots.

When I gave out my EOD award the other day, I got a comment from Lucy at Pictures Just Pictures. She remarked on how she had liked the original header I had on this blog and hoped I would bring it back some day. I told her I would share some of those pictures and now here they are:

Click to enlarge.

My original blog header

 

Middle of the Road

The Track Less Traveled

The Path

Train vs ATV (see the face on the front of the train)

And for a little fun...What says the holidays like candles and Crown!

I hope you have enjoyed these...I know it's weird looking at winter pictures in the heat of summer!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: Here We Are At 100 Posts

I have had this post brewing for a week now and it's a little late but no worries...

Technically this post is really 101 but it is the celebration of all things One Hundred. With that in mind I shall not wax nostalgic, but rather entertain and possibly confound.

I started this blog in Jauary with a diatribe on the Haitian disaster (is anyone even talking about it any more...it's only been 6 months) and now it appears they have given up. If the Dominican Republic has any sense they will lay a huge row of massive explosives along the border between those two countries and set Haiti adrift. There is no hope. You heard it here first.

Okay, I waxed a little nostalgic for a minute. I will leave the early musings of this blog to those who wish to explore them at their leisure.

Alright, celebration of all things One Hundred:

* I would like to live to at least this age (preferrably 200) and feel no worse than I do now.

* 100 pennies make a dollar, 100 dollars makes, well $100. And so on...you get the idea. Pick up that penny on the ground, dumbass!

* 100 bottles of beer on the wall...great drinking song, stupid practical idea. Why put them on the wall, why not just call some friends, have a party, and drink them?

* 100 calories seems to be a mystical number. Remember the 100-calorie packs of cookies and crackers? Just meant you would eat 3 of those packs rather than one long package out of a box. Yes, THEY really think we are that stupid.

* Following 100 blogs. That's just impossible...like the four minute mile or space travel.

* 100 minutes...well that just doesn't make sense or mean anything.

* 100 blog followers. The first major triple-digit milestone, if you are into that sort of narcissistic stuff. And who among us isn't? Really.

* The Hundred Years War. Was that even real??? Who could still be that mad after a century? I'll bet it was just an excuse to party.

* Bowling a 100 game. WTF...this only earns you jeers from your friends and possibly strangers on the next lane. Get a Wii and practice why don't cha!

* Having a 100-win season in baseball...yep, that'll get to the playoffs every time.

* 100 decibels of sound. A subway or a power mower will create this for ya. And keep the in-laws away.

* 100 bank failures this year! Congratulations you morons...

* The Mormon Tabernacle Choir has reached 100 years of recordings. How many songs could THAT be???

* Billboards Hot 100 hits. Who doesn't like listening to music...a lot.

* 100 MILESTONE DOCUMENTS OF AMERICAN HISTORY. Everything from the Declaration of Independence (1776) to the Voting Rights Act (1965).

Time to stop since I am wandering all over the place with this. Though come to think of it, I do a bit of wandering all the time on this blog anyway. I still feel very fluid and drift in and out of subject matter for my posts. I appreciate all of you who read when you can, I really appreciate those who take the time to comment (especially if you follow tons of blogs). As you can see I am fairly unorganized in my blog layout but I have always been a "throw a lot of pieces on the floor and then see what happens" kind of person. At least it will be fun figuring it out! Starting and continuing this blog for 6 months is a major accomplishment since I never know if what I have to say on any given post resonates with my readers.

Anyway, I've decided I will just do my thing as the winds of fate blow, and whatever happens, happens. I don't even know what the hell that means!!!

At least the graphs are a hit!

On to 200!

Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Monday Minute

Once again my contribution to the Monday Minute. These are starting to be reflective on my after work mood on Monday. Very cathartic.

Here goes:


- Describe your life in one word.

Spatchcocked...it's my clean word for the F-word. And it made me laugh for 6 months straight as I used it several times a day...try it!


- Is there something you wish you had learned how to do as a child?

Roll the perfect smoke...it's a skill that always impresses. And Debbie Hines would have been my 5th grade girlfriend then! Bitch.


- Who has been the biggest influence on your life?

Gee there have been so many...but I'm going with Hunter S Thompson!






- What is your greatest dream/hope/aspiration?

I dream and I hope I don't aspirate in my sleep. Such a tragic way for John Bonham to die. And I had tickets to the Zeppelin show that fall. Dammit!

 

-Do you believe you have reached your potential? Why/why not?

Excuse me? This is formed as an essay question and I'm potentially too tired for that! And since for me my potential is a daily thing, I have been all I can be today.

Goodnight! 

Today's Apocalypse Sign: The Weekend Graphs Are Here!

Time again to delight and entertain the blog readers. I am sure you will find something or maybe a couple things that will make you laugh or at least go, "aha!" Enjoy this weeks graphs!




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