Today's Apocalypse Sign: Let's Get To It - Zombie Apocalypse

Many people think and wish for a Zombie Apocalypse (ZA). This is a curious fetish along the lines of being star-struck by a murderer in prison and then wanting to be with (or marry) them. Well, if this is your thing then we need to cover this possibility for 12.21.12.

Educate Yourself

Let's start with a primer for a pandemic caused ZA. (If you planned some Pandemic Pictionary from yesterday's post, give yourself bonus points). What better way to start than with an educational film.

This film was released on SyFy back in 2011 and took place in 2011. It is pandemic-based and zombies chase our heros to Catalina Island for refuge. How Ving Rhames does not go "down right medieval on their zombie asses" and save the world is to waste what he learned in Pulp Fiction. I have never seen this movie but I am sure it has loads of tips on what to do and not do in regards to ZA. {I have seen Zombieland and Woody gives some good tips too.}

Dress For The Kill

Next, you need to dress the part. You can get the latest zombie T-Shirts at where else...Zombie T-Shirts! One of my personal favorites is this beauty...

I also recommend some protective clothing and a good start would be...what else? attack dog training suit! Bonus is it protects your neck too.

We Must Protect This House!

Now you are ready for some home security. Here is a genius method you could take care of this weekend at your local Academy Sports store.

This would allow you to literally shoot zombies like fish in a barrel as they endlessly try to keep walking to get into your house. Be sure to keep your electric bill paid...you'll need plenty of juice!!

Zombie Blades

Weaponry is now in order. Let's start with blades...get as many as you can! Go to Zombie Tools and check out some of the badass blades you can buy today! Start with these beauties...

This is the Apokatana - must have.

The Mack Daddy-O is 42 inches and 4 pounds of Zombie stopping power

There are many other choices including smaller personal defense blades you will want to carry on your person at all times. Not cheap but these products will not break or let you down so go get ya some!

The Armory

Okay, last for today is the firepower you need to stop the brain bunglers from a safe distance. If you can't trust the validity of ask.com chiming in on the ZA who can you trust? Best Guns for the Zombie Apocalyse are right here for your evaluation. My first selection would be...

M16 with the M203 grenade launcher
For single or group kills

My next selection would be the Remington 870 shotgun with a sidesaddle for serious splattering power. A 45-cal and 357 for a personal sidearm, a Tommy gun with a 100-round drum and the coup de gras...the flame thrower!!

This should get you started on your way to self protection and getting your band of brothers ready to defend. What? You don't have a band of brothers?? Maybe that should have been at the very top of the list...well if you haven't made any friends you can count on, maybe your brain should be eaten.

How are you preparing?

More to come....